My annual New Year’s Eve tradition is to go through each month of the past year and think of the triumphs and trials associated with it. A few recent years are even immortalized on the internet.
But last year I broke with that tradition.
Instead I scrolled Instagram stories and picked out the visually memorable moments for a highlight reel (which included a fair amount of lowlights as well…) and while it provided the same sense of traditional retrospection, I’ve come to enjoy, it left me feeling empty and uninspired. A traumatic year for so many, the recap was filled with reminders of what my mindset was like at each milestone throughout the year.
True, there was plenty of evidence of the fun that we had in between the hard stuff. But the recap felt more like reopening wounds than processing my feelings about them.
This year, thanks to the fact it was a year full of challenges and growth, I don’t have much documented on the internet from 2021. And I’m finding that I’m OK with that. Having lived my private struggles and persevered through is enough. I’m leaving the year feeling confident in my choices and empowered to continue advocating for myself, my family, and my community. I am not just exiting the year, I am entering a new one.
This year I won’t have to start showing up authentically, because the past has already taught me how to do just that. This year is the year I carry forward the hopes and dreams into a future that I design. This year I’m not looking back.